<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Scream (day 10-paralyzed/survivor's guilt) by Only_Slightly_Obsessed (A_Stressed_Cupcake)</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26935063">Scream (day 10-paralyzed/survivor's guilt)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Stressed_Cupcake/pseuds/Only_Slightly_Obsessed'>Only_Slightly_Obsessed (A_Stressed_Cupcake)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rémy's 2020 Multifandom Whumptober Works [10]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Les Misérables - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Badly, F/M, Marius needs a therapist, Oh god, Sleep Paralysis, Whumptober 2020, and that's ok, he gets cuddles from Cosette instead</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 16:15:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>556</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26935063</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Stressed_Cupcake/pseuds/Only_Slightly_Obsessed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Marius wakes up hours before dawn. <br/>Or at least, he thinks he does. <br/>Sure, his eyes are open. Sure, his thoughts are running. But they’re the only thing that’s running, or moving at all for that matter. His limbs? Not so much. </p><p>_____<br/>Whumptober 2020- day 10: paralyzed/survivor's guilt</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Cosette Fauchelevent/Marius Pontmercy, Marius Pontmercy &amp; Les Amis de l'ABC</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Rémy's 2020 Multifandom Whumptober Works [10]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1965271</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Whumptober 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Scream (day 10-paralyzed/survivor's guilt)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>cw imaginary violence, sleep paralysis</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Marius wakes up hours before dawn. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Or at least, he thinks he does. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Sure, his eyes are open. Sure, his thoughts are running. But they’re the only thing that’s running, or moving at all for that matter. His limbs? Not so much. Marius tries to sit up. Nothing.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His muscles are frozen stiff. It’s like his bones are made of heavy stone.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He can’t turn his head, but he can move his eyes, at least. Out the corner of his vision, he can see Cosette’s hair on the pillow. She has such pretty hair. She sleeps on her left side, facing away from him, but she’s close enough that he could probably wake her by touching her back. Cosette is a light sleeper.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>But he can’t touch her, for as tantalisingly close as she is, because his arm isn’t responding to his commands. His jaw is set. His spine still. His legs numb. He can’t move.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He feels his breathing pick up a little. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Alright, so he can’t move yet, but it seems to be getting a little better. His finger twitches. Maybe if he can speak up Cosette will help him. His jaw is set, but he can still just scream.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Except he can’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>When he tries to scream, all that comes out is a tiny, pathetic whimper that sounds more like a hiss of steam than a scream. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marius wonders if he’ll ever be able to move again. It doesn’t feel like it. Whatever crushing weight has enveloped his whole body gives no sign of ever being lifted. He can’t move. He can’t move and Cosette won’t wake up.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Any progress he may have made in his attempts to breathe normally crumbles when he sees something moving out the corner of his eye.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s not Cosette. She’s on the other side. Something is moving. Someone is in their bedroom.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Straining to move his eyes beyond their reach, Marius can make out the figure of what seems like a young man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Not any young man. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He’s wearing the same clothes he had at the barricade, ruined and bloodied by the gash on his side and the bullet in his neck, but it’s him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Marius has to wonder why it’s a different one every night. He sees them all, in his nightmares, alive or dead, alone or together, smiling or screaming, but seeing Courfeyrac is always the worst. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Just like every night, he can’t tell him how </span>
  <em>
    <span>sorry</span>
  </em>
  <span> he is. That may be the worst part.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Courfeyrac doesn’t get any closer; he doesn’t need to.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>More than ever, it makes him want to scream.</span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry! </span>
  </em>
  <span>he screams in his mind, over and over, but there’s no sound to go with it. It’s unfair. He wants to scream so badly, he wants to tell his friend to get closer, that he’s sorry, that he would trade him, but he can’t. He </span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His pathetic scream isn’t getting any louder.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It’s quiet, too quiet, and he loses his chance.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Courfeyrac leaves and Cosette </span>
  <em>
    <span>finally</span>
  </em>
  <span> hears him.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She strokes his hair until he can move again, and kisses his forehead, and tells him that he’ll be alright. He holds her tight to his chest and he knows he’s a liar.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He always says he’s happy now, three years after the barricade.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cosette knows better.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They all know better.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Aaaaaand I'm caught up  :D</p><p>So yeah, the author suffers from sleep paralysis and wanted to write about it but that survivor's guilt prompt was just begging to be a Marius story.</p><p>-Rémy</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>